I lived many challenges since childhood; whether at school or at the Army or even the rest of the stages, but I discovered that the hardest challenge did not come from the outside but it came from the inside, and I had to deal with it as well .<\/p>\n
The Majority Pressures:<\/strong><\/p>\n I\u2019m a Southern citizen, I was born in Northern Sudan in Atbara; I was raised in a Christian family, and I went through all the age stages within the church: from Sunday School and Young Adult Ministry to Youth Ministry, and throughout all this period I thanked God that my parents did not shorten my support; although they were humble and had a very low income . A New Place:<\/strong><\/p>\n After my graduation, it was time to serve my country, and I thank God that He arranged for me a unit to join in the regular forces in Juba, and precisely in the Wild Life Unit; where I got respect from all my colleagues, I spoke a lot about life with The Christ and how to face challenges against Christianity joyfully.<\/p>\n And because I\u2019m a military man, I used to work in the Office of Unit Management; so it was hard for me to find enough time to practice my Christian worship, but God prepared that the manager of the military unit \u2013whose rank was brigadier-general\u2013was a Christian believer. So we used to sit together every morning and we assigned some time to study The Bible, we also invited more soldiers to join us. It was too much that when the soldiers came to inform the Office of Unit Management in the early morning, they were notified that the management staff \u2013 they meant us\u2013 are doing their prayers inside; which was an exceptional matter in the military and had a great influence on them and on us too.<\/p>\n The Cruelty of Injustice:<\/strong> A Fake Forgiveness:<\/strong><\/p>\n After the former situation I talked to myself wondering:\u201dWhy did I do that?\u201d Then I prayed, and I vowed not to say anything against the man who insulted me, and I prayed saying: \u201cO Lord, You are the one who knows all that has happened between me and this man, and I have forgiven him”. While I was praying one day, I felt that the Lord is telling me: \u201cMy son, love doesn\u2019t need an apology, when the Christ died on the cross many people rejected him, and his disciples fled, even his dearest disciples Peter and John; and yet the Christ did not wait for them to come to him saying \u201cO Lord, forgive us”.<\/p>\n The End of Bitterness:<\/strong><\/p>\n Here I realized my huge mistake; I was waiting for the man who threatened me to be the first to come and apologize in front of all, as if every time I say: \u201c I have forgiven you\u201d, reminding him of what he did that day, as if I put all these events on the shelves of the wardrobe in order, and when it\u2019s time I retrieve them in the same order and the same days. My dear\u2026 There is no doubt that we, as we are humans, face many challenges every now and then, that could be harsh on us at the time we encounter them, but the criterion is not in the challenge itself , it\u2019s in our reaction towards it. Will we act according to our family or tribal nature? Or according to our divine nature that we acquired from our faith in the Christ?<\/p>\n Maybe you\u2019re holding something against someone who insulted or hurt you in your conscience or your heart, that is why I need to tell you : Don\u2019t act the way I did, don\u2019t lie in your prayers to God, telling him that you have forgiven the person who trespassed against you; for the increasing lack of forgiveness in our psyche leads to bitterness and a desire for revenge, which is a bad fruit.<\/p>\n But we are all invited to the real forgiveness, that kind of forgiveness which Jesus Christ has shown on the cross, and then you will conquer even the hardest challenges inside you, which is the challenge of forgiveness, at that moment your heart will be cleansed and purified, and you\u2019ll be ready to receive God\u2019s blessings in your life.<\/p>\n <\/p>\n
\nThe whole situation varied a lot at school, we were Christian minority and the majority of students were Muslims; so we had to attend all the Islam classes, we even memorized some verses from The Quran, and it didn\u2019t stop at that, but\u2013 at a very young age\u2013 a lot of pressure was practiced on us from the Muslims surrounding us to leave our Christianity in order to join the Islamic faith.
\nAt that point my dear parents played their role, they used to teach me that we will continue as Christians, giving me many Christian lessons that taught me how to answer every question regarding my Christianity, till I reached the secondary stage and I entered Juba university; where I spent five years, then graduated, and started a new chapter in my life.<\/p>\n
\nOne day, we were in the military unit management, one of the colleagues came to us with rage accusing us of manipulating some of his procedures and questioning our integrity and competence. So; I found myself asking him not to rush with his terrible accusations, but he remained angry, and went on shouting, then he started uttering offensive words against me.
\n\u201cThis is not true my friend\u2026 Calm down and everything will be alright\u201d, I replied nicely.
\n\u201cYou\u2019re cowardly and afraid of me, and you do not know who is behind me, and I can kill you while you are in your place\u201d, he said.
\nAt that moment I felt really angry, and I returned to my old nature, so I found myself answering him: \u201cI\u2019m not a coward and I can fight with you as well \u201c. And here some people interfered telling me : \u201cSimon, you\u2019re a man of religion\u201d
\n\u201cBut I\u2019m not a coward too\u201d I replied. Then I left him and went out with anger and sorrow; not because of him or because of them, but because of me!<\/p>\n
\nDespite that decision, I discovered that whenever I see this man come into our office, the same scene automatically comes to my mind. I stop talking or laughing, and I feel very angry at him. So I went back to pray to God and said to him:\u201d Why is this feeling coming back to me? Why am I still trapped in this? ”<\/p>\n
\nBy the time I figured out God\u2019s purpose, to have the same nature that He Has, to go and reconcile even with whoever insulted us. I decided to go to the man who hurt me and speak to him; although I wasn\u2019t able to shake hands at the beginning, I told him: \u201c Buddy, I\u2019m sorry for what I did, please forgive me\u201d then I went out leaving him.
\nWhen I spoke these words, I felt deep peace within me, and now whenever that guy passes by me, we talk to each other and laugh without feeling any bitterness or pain.<\/p>\n